Heather Stimmler-Hall could be poster child for American junior year abroad programs, or perhaps a cautionary tale. In either case, Heather has done what many American students in Europe on their junior year abroad dream of doing: extending their stay overseas and parlaying their growing fluency and deepening cross-cultural insights into actual work.
Born near Philadelphia, PA, and gone to high shool in Scottsdale, AZ, she came to Paris for her junior year from Carleton College in Northfield, Minnesota, in 1995. After returning to Carleton to complete her B.A. degree as a political science major, Ms. Stimmler-Hall came back to Paris, worked in bars and a muffin shop for two years, and began sharpening her skills as travel journalist.
In the past decade she has worked as travel editor of elle.com, contributed to the Michelin Green, Fodor’s, and Time Out Guides, and written for France Magazine, Elle, and other magazines. In addition to her freelance work she operates the web site www.SecretsofParis.com.
France Revisited caught up with Heather Stimmler-Hall on the occasion of the release of her new guidebook Naughty Paris: A Lady’s Guide to the Sexy City. Click here for the review of the book.
You and Paris
Gary Lee Kraut: What were you doing in the U.S. before you came to France?
Heather Stimmler-Hall: I was a student last time I lived in the US.
GLK: What would you be doing if you’d stayed in the U.S.?
HSH: Either White House journalist or environmental lawyer.
GLK: What was your first job as a journalist?
HSH: I was the Teen Correspondent for the Phoenix Gazette (now called the Arizona Republic) in 1992. They sent me to a journalists’ conference on “reporting on AIDS/HIV” and I got a t-shirt that said “If you can’t talk about sex, you can’t talk about AIDS.” So I guess you could say I got an early start in my career on the topic of sexuality.
You and Naughty Paris
GLK: What inspired you to write this book?
HSH: I had a lot of tour clients and readers of my Secrets of Paris newsletter ask me for this type of information, and I thought since there was a gap in the guidebook market, why not fill it?
GLK: You give such great insights into naughty pleasures in Paris. Would you consider yourself a naughty lady?
HSH: When it comes to chocolate and self-pampering, I’m definitely naughty. Good thing I have a fast metabolism! But as for the naughty nightlife, I’m actually a bit old fashioned. I prefer dinner and a movie to fetish parties and sex clubs.
GLK: Were you already in touch with your inner femme fatale before coming to Paris or did you find her in the City of Light?
HSH: I was 20 when I came to Paris, and it took about a decade to even figure out what afemme fatale really was.
GLK: Is it more fun to date a Frenchman or an American? What are the advantages of one and the other?
HSH: Naughty Paris is basically for tourists, not for establishing long-term relationships. I think the French are more fun for a vacation fling. I’m going to plead the fifth on the rest of that question.
GLK: Do you find yourself acting differently or make yourself act differently when flirting in French and flirting in English?
HSH: I sound a lot more intelligent in English. That’s not saying a lot about my French language skills!
GLK: How has understanding the French sense of seduction affected your own approach to sex, dating, romance and/or fun in Paris?
HSH: I’m still trying to figure that one out.
Pampering
GLK: Why is Paris such a great city for a woman to pamper herself?
HSH: Because the French aren’t so hung up about the whole pampering thing. Americans may indulge in day spas and manicures, but there’s something so “efficient” about it all. The French ladies pamper themselves in little ways all of the time, without guilt, shame, or having to “work for it” to deserve it. They feel it’s their birthright.
GLK: Let’s say an open-minded American woman, over 35, with decent finances, wants to come to Paris for a long weekend. Is she going to enjoy herself more with her girlfriends or with her guy?
HSH: I would say that depends on who your friends are and who the guy is. It’s always more fun with fun, open-minded, daring people. And if your man or your friends don’t fit this description, find new ones.
Seduction
GLK: How are Parisian women different from other French women?
HSH: A lot more refined in terms of fashion and culture, but also a lot more snobby and overly concerned about what other people think—without making it seem like she cares, of course. Parisians in general are mortified at the idea of looking silly, so they tend to not let their hair down as easily as French women from out of town.
GLK: How are Parisian men different from other Frenchmen?
HSH: Ditto. I should add that this is similar in most big cities like N.Y. and London.
GLK: Do American charms, whatever they may be, truly have no place in Paris? Aren’t Frenchmen attracted to American women for their mere foreignness?
HSH: There’s that exotic allure that American women have, sure. The best thing is to mix the best of both worlds.
Sex
GLK: Are Frenchmen, and particularly Parisian men, truly good lovers? Why?
HSH: I think I covered that in the chapter “On French Men.” It’s really subjective, though. If it was that easy to calculate, we’d have a scoring system!
GLK: Can the Parisian man’s attempts at seduction work in the U.S. or will it only work with Francophiles?
HSH: I don’t think there’s a formula, but if a man is really successful with women, borders shouldn’t be an issue.
GLK: Regarding the sections in your book devoted to Libertine (Swinger) clubs and Fetish outings, is Paris particularly well-endowed in such clubs compared with other cities?
HSH: I’m not sure if Paris has more swingers’ clubs than other cities or if they’re just less hidden. I haven’t been researching the scene in other cities.
GLK: What does an American guy need to do to get laid in Paris?
HSH: No idea. I didn’t write a book for men because I wouldn’t be able to do the research. Perhaps there’s another market gap for you, Gary!
European Naughtiness
GLK: What are the top three naughty destinations in Europe and what differentiates them?
HSH: Berlin, London, and Amsterdam will be the next three cities after Naughty Paris, but I won’t know until after the research is done how to answer the second half of that question. As I like to remind people, I researched and wrote Naughty Paris because I thought it was a guidebook topic that hadn’t been done yet, not because I was already familiar with that lifestyle. I’m looking for local female writers in other cities to do the next guides. It may turn out after the research that I’ll find that no other city caters to women’s fantasies the way Paris does! I try not to have any preconceived ideas about what’s out there. My high school journalism teacher would be proud!